bible study

If you're here, you're likely a Christian woman, right? That's like a given, right? And so, what makes us Christian women? Romans 10:9 says that if we confess with our mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in our heart, God raised him from the dead, we will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified. It is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved. So when we know Jesus as our savior, then we want to live for him and like him, and we've died to ourselves and therefore we serve him. Right?

So those are like foundational concepts of salvation, but why then do we, particularly as Christian women who believe this and have that power, still end up with shaky voices, feeling like we can't speak our truth or feeling uncertain about ourselves, not feeling good enough, feeling worried about what other people think, having anxiety or physical sensations that come along with anxiety or have mental junk getting in our way?

The reason being, obviously, because we're in a fallen world and we're also in a situation where the enemy wants to come and mess with us, and so we don't want to let him mess with us, and that's something we don't have to let him do. So, I'm going to go through this as we think about those lies that you in particular may have kind of nagging you in the background. Raise your hand if any of those sound like things that go through your head on a pretty regular basis.

Yeah, It's like universal, and it's so dumb for it to be so universal. It's like the enemy is not that creative, right? So, it's not dumb that we feel how we feel, but if everybody is having this, it's like we should be able to see this is not real because I'll bet you can look at all the other women in here and think they have something important of God in them and have something important to contribute. If I were talking to them, I'd encourage them and tell them how great they are. Right? And you guys have done that. So, what makes you any different?

That's the lie of the enemy, that we're different. That's the lie that we're the ones who don't know what we're talking about, we're going to embarrass ourselves, we're not a good enough Christian, or whatever those lies are.

I just want to encourage you that that is the enemy's boringness as far as he's not very creative. It's the same old lies. It's the same old junk. He's all about comparison, and there really is no comparison in Christ, right? We're individuals. He's all about one-upping people and shame and guilt. That's not of God either. When we're aware of it and you realize, each of us realizes that we are not the odd-one-out (as in nothing new under the sun), and that God died for us, and we are saved because of Him, and we have His power, that's where we really can stand in that power.

So, this is a "both/and" thing, right? Because this membership is off of a podcast that's Mental Health for Christian Women. Well, mental health for Christian women is an important concept because there are mental health issues, there are emotional health issues, and there are things like nervous systems that have gotten lots of messages from trauma in the past and things that make us more prone to some of this junk that we're thinking. As a coach and as a therapist, I can say this and also say the other, which is feelings and thoughts matter, and yet feelings and thoughts don't matter. Both are true. They totally matter in the sense that we need to be aware of them. We need to take them captive. We need to be aware of what they're trying to tell us, because God made us with thoughts and feelings, but we can't be ruled by them, and we can't let them lie to us. They are not the most important thing, and they don't define us. When you look at it through that, it's, again, one of those concepts that I say a lot, which is "both/and" because they're important, and yet they are not the most important thing. They are not the truth tellers. They are not the things that tell you your identity. They are not the things that tell you the truth about yourself. They merely tell you perceptions of the experience that you're having in your thoughts and your emotions at that point, but they are not based on your identity in Christ.

Now, it'd be great if they always lined up like that and you could feel confident in your body, thoughts, and feelings. This all lines up in my identity in Christ. Ideally, that would be great, but because that's not how we always live in this world, it's very hard to do that because we do have bodies, but God made the bodies intelligently to protect us and help us. We need to do the "both/and" and pay attention to the thoughts and feelings as well as heal the wounds, get them tended to, whether that's counseling, going to a good friend, having prayer being done over us, or all of them. It's all good, but we need to take that intentional time to heal and to be aware of what we're noticing.

So, in that way, it's important, but here's why it's not the end all be all. First, your identity, your power comes from God. You've probably heard me say this before, but Romans 8:11, says that the same spirit that raised Jesus from the dead, lives in you as a Christian woman, which means the spirit that can overcome even death is in you and in Him, we live and move and have our being. That's Acts 17:28. Therefore, the power of God that is in you and that you live out of is God. You are breathed from God. In Genesis 2:7, it says, then the Lord God formed the human of dust from the ground and breathed into his nostrils breath of life, and the human became a living creature. That naturally goes into this next one, which is 1 Corinthians 6:19-20: Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit who is in you? (again, that power in you, that breath in you) whom you have received from God, you are not your own. You were bought at a price. So, if you are not your own, you are the temple of the Holy Spirit. And I say this to myself as well: How dare we think that we're not good enough? That's like a smack in the face in a sense, if someone says, no, I've given you everything. I've died for you. I've raised again. I've given you that power, and I know who you are, and you are mine, and I breathed into you. Who in the world are we to say, I can't do it? I'm not good enough? Oh, I should shrink back because what will other people think? Oh, I don't know. I'm too scared right now.

It doesn't mean that we don't have to deal with those things that hurt us or that God cares. He's there. He sees our tears. He bottles them up. He finds us precious and dependent on Him, of course. But at the same time, it's kind of prideful to think that we're not good enough because it's almost saying we have knowledge against what God says about us, and so wouldn't that be sin?

Maybe we need to get out of our own way and say, okay, let's take the stuff that's ensnaring us, those thoughts and those feelings, and instead turn them back to Christ and go, no, I know who I am in the Lord. I know that I have the breath of God in me and the power of the Holy Spirit. So then having that awareness, we get to put that towards our feelings, and that's where we get to take back our power. We get to realize that, as Matthew 5:14-16 says, we are the light of the world, a city that is set on a hill, that cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your father in heaven. So, when we are that lamp and let our light shine, we are glorifying God and that's our purpose. That's why we're here. It all points back to Him.

If you ever doubt whether God can use you, or whether you are good enough, or whether others know better than you, or whether your voice and thoughts and life matters, remember what Psalm 139:14 says that you are fearfully and wonderfully made, that God's works are wonderful, and we know that full well. If you would know that for your neighbor here, know it for yourself; you are that wonderful creation.

When the enemy tries to lie to you and 1 Peter 5:8-9 says that's the case: Be sober, be vigilant because he enemy tries to roar like a lion, seeking whom he may devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith. Don't be one of those he may just. No, that's that old lie. Not true. I'm going to stand against that in Jesus' name. I know who I am In Christ! The enemy's going to say, she's no fun. She won't play anymore!

Do you know that it is not selfish to take care of you and your own needs? That is something that is super important, especially in the Christian lifestyle. So many Christian women struggle with it because they feel like they're not being self-sacrificing or they feel they should be this way, or they should be that way, but that doesn't involve putting their own thoughts, opinions, and needs into stuff. That is just not true. Here's the thing: How can we love other people as we would want them to love us and do unto others as you would have them do unto you if there is no you that is treated well? The way we go around treating ourselves as Christian women is sometimes worse than we would treat an enemy. Now, if you just chuckled at that, and you know what I mean, then this is for you.

You have to have a self. God, Himself, gave you a self, and that self being stewarded well, is not selfish. It's worship. It is absolutely worship to take care of the body and the being that the Lord granted you with at birth. Before birth, actually, I believe at conception that the Lord came in and made you. When he breathed life into you, you into existence, everything was already there. God was there. You were there, and your potential was there. How your body works was there. We need to know that it's okay to be us. You are not some extra secondhand thought that God had. You are absolutely important and known by God before you had one day of life.

So why? Why do you think that you shouldn't have a voice, a choice, needs, or desires or use your gifts or that you're not worth anything? Please, please, please hear me. This is so important. You must begin with you and God. You cannot change anything in your external world for the long haul in a good direction if you are not honest with yourself, you are depleted, you are resentful, you are exhausted, and you are just running on fumes; you have to reverse engineer it. Well, not really reverse engineer it. Reverse it. Forget the engineering part. You have to reverse it. You need to change up the priority. It needs to start with you and God. You've heard me say this before: you start in that inner circle with God and then branch out from there.

Branching out from there means things like self-care, and that means setting up boundaries as to what is acceptable treatment of you and what isn't. That means making choices that are stewarding well what's been given to you. That includes taking time to heal the stuff that's going on inside. That might be emotions that are hurting you repeatedly over years that you're still having trouble getting on top of, and you just keep hoping and praying it away, but it's still there and you need help with it. That could be your thoughts needing to be reframed in light of scripture and truth and more helpful ways of thinking. That could be taking time to simply have a nourishing breakfast and some good hydration and some time with the Lord. There are so many ways that you can steward yourself time with other people who are uplifting and that you can pour into as well.

Or maybe you just need to be poured into and you're going to pour into them when you get a chance. It's okay to be where you are. You've heard me say that before, too. You have so much power. Do not give it away. That's something that happens so often, is we say, I'll get to it another day, or I'm not as important as somebody else, or I don't need to worry about this right now. God will just take care of it. God will take care of things. But sometimes, many times, He's already given you the power to take care of the stewardship that He gave Adam in the garden. Right? To work the land. That was before the fall, that Adam was here to do something. God has put you here to do something and to do something well. You need to have your tools: your body, your mind, your emotions, your relationships, your supports, and your purpose all working together at least most of the time to really get some good traction.

So, if there are things that are getting in your way that are not giving you that good traction. Then that's an area to step up and say, I need to do something different. When people do that, sometimes they get overwhelmed and they try to figure out, well, what is that next step up or what would be the best way? Then that negative thought starts coming in. Stuff like, oh, well, you can't do that because of this or, well, no, that's not going to work because of this. That is that stuff called stinking thinking. There is a way to problem solve. No matter what you are going through, there is a way to do it in a way that works well for you. Even if the situation is unpleasant that you're going through, the way that you handle it can be beneficial and work well for you. And if that gets overwhelming for you, you might get that stress paralyzation that I've talked about, and we don't want you to have to get to that place.

I want you to understand that there is help available and you don't necessarily have to go to therapy. If you've been on the fence about, should I do therapy? It's kind of scary. I can't find a therapist. I don't know where to go. I highly recommend therapy. In my day job, I am a therapist. Yet, if that's not your first step, if that's not what you need right now, or if you need something more, get real with yourself. What do you need? Do you need to go join a gym? Do you need to just start walking with a buddy? Do you need to reach out and make a new friend and take them to lunch? Do you need to spend time in Bible study and prayer? Do you need time to connect with others and learn more so that you can grow and take the first steps? Whatever it is, just get real about it and then put forth that action. Be a good steward. Do what you need to with what's in your hand now and do. Don't get overwhelmed by the big picture. You don't have to have everything working all the time and all at once, but you can optimize things as you realize, hey, this is an area that I could use some improvement in.

If that area that you could use some improvement in is the area of self-care, I want to invite you to join the membership community. The membership community is a place where you can get support for reaching your personal goals. Whether you're ready for counseling or you're not, and you just want some tools and skills and coaching, this is a good thing. If you are in counseling, this is a good thing to come alongside it. That can also help strengthen the skills that you need as you go through the processing of the things that you need to. Or this can be a wonderful next step after therapy is concluded. This membership community can be a helpful companion to you, and you can use it the way that you want to use it. If you just want to get the monthly materials and access to the training vault, go for it, and you join us on a weekly Monday meeting call. If you want to ask me questions, you get coaching access to me through posting in the community. I will answer your questions. I will give you direction. If you ask for it, I will give you some help so that you can decide what's best for you to reach your goals. I'm not going to counsel you. We're not going to do anything to make you go past your level of comfort. We're going to push you a little bit outside of your comfort zone as far as what you are doing now, but not to a place where this has to be uncomfortable.

This is an excellent first step. If you've been thinking, I need help and you keep putting it off because yourself keeps getting pushed to the back burner, I want you to really understand that you are important. You are important. Everything in your life is affected by how well you treat yourself and how well you take care of the things God's entrusted to you; every relationship, every thought, every action, every goal is impacted by what you do with your thoughts, feelings, actions, choices, and your relationships. As I said, it all comes back to how you steward what begins with you and what begins with you began with God, so the two of you make an invincible team. There is good stuff there.

Please don't neglect it. This isn't because I'm trying to get some sale of the membership community. I would love for you to join the membership community, but this is because I see it all too often, Christian women who don't actually take time for themselves. There was a time where I didn't take care of myself in the sense that I would just not even buy myself clothes. I'd just wear my husband's old shirt, tie it up in a knot at the bottom, and say, okay, that's good enough, you know, or I'd wear the same thing all the time. I mean, yes, it'd be clean and washed, but I never expanded anything. Take care of myself or I didn't do the extra things like get a piece of jewelry that would make me feel good and confident in presenting myself professionally. These are things that, why not?

It's not a sin to do things that make you happy. They're not sin to do things that are necessary just for survival and self-care. They're not sin to be good stewards of what God's entrusted to you. When you have a well-developed self, you go out into the world well developed and well impactful, if that's even a word. You can be impactful because you have a solid base from which you're launching.