What is that one thing on your heart you want to get started? What is that one thing that is hanging out there which is nagging at you? If you could only gain traction on this one thing, it would really be a blessing and give you the momentum to move forward. Identify what it is! Although it may not fulfill you immediately, it will feel good to get started on it.
Game Plan-Reverse Engineer It!
So, what is that goal you want to work towards? After you identify it, you will want to reverse engineer it, so you know how to get there. Reverse engineering is something I had no clue about until I married my husband who is guess what? An engineer! He thinks in a totally different way than I think. While I think in vision and possibilities, he thinks in specifics and in very intentionally, practical ways to get somewhere.
For example, if you need to get somewhere at a certain time, you figure out how long it's going to take you to get there and subtract that from the time, you figure out how long it will take you get ready and subtract that from the time, and you figure out how long it will take you to get things together and subtract that from the time. You should also give yourself a buffer of probably 15 minutes, and then you will most likely get there on time. Since I learned that concept, it's so much easier! Once you know the tools, the skills, and have a game plan, you can apply it anytime you need!
This is where coaching can support you! Coaching can help you apply a game plan, a blueprint, or a roadmap which can help you to know how to get to that goal. But before you can do that, you have to know your goal!
How To Work Towards Your Goal
So, what's that one thing that keeps hanging around which you wish you could make some progress on that would really change or improve your life and possibly stop you from feeling so guilty because it's not getting done?
- Identify it!
- Write it out very specifically.
- Reverse engineer it to the most basic and simplest components of how to go backwards to that beginning step of where you are now.
- Take the first step.
- Keep taking the next step until you reach your goal.
For example, let's say your goal Is to lose 5 pounds and it's really important to you because you have a special event and you want to lose it before a certain date, so you can wear this dress you bought that's now too tight and won't zip.
- Identify it: I will want to lose 5 lbs!
- Write it: I want to lose 5 lbs. by [date]
- Reverse engineer it: Estimate a pound a week or a pound and a half a week depending on the timeframe of this event with some buffer time of a few days.
- Take the first step: Get a weight loss calculator to know how many calories take in to ensure it helps with the loss of a pound/week. Instead of counting calories, it might be creating an exercise plan and going on that first walk.
- Keep taking the next Step until you reach your goal: You keep taking the next doable step. It's actually not about whether or not you can succeed at losing the 5 pounds as much as it is about taking the next action step which moves you towards your goal.
It's very possible that by taking the actions in five weeks' time, you actually lose 10 pounds because you did 2 pounds a week. Well, that's even better but it still starts with one action step. You break it down and decide what you're going to do that's going to continue on a regular basis. I hate to make this example around a weight loss goal as I know there can often be other things tied into that, so this example is for simplicity because most of us are aware of a goal in that area.
A personal goal for me was obtaining my Masters' degree in Counseling. In order to get there, I had to take one course towards my degree at a time because I was also a stay-at-home mom raising 3 young kids. I could not have taken a full course load and also been fulfill my role as a mom. Eventually, I obtained my degree by reverse engineering. It may have taken 4 years instead of 2 at the rate for which I could complete the courses, but the final result was the degree...the goal was met!
Why Don't You Succeed in Meeting the Goal and How Can a Coach Help?
The reason we don't often succeed in meeting our goal is because there are other factors such as, motivation, energy, what's going on in our life, and other stressors, so it's important to be realistic about what you can do.
To go back to our weight loss example, the next question in coaching this particular situation is what could get in the way of you being able to walk on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays at 8 am? If it's because they don't wake up until 10 am, maybe they start getting up earlier or shift to a more realistic time to walk possibly on a lunch hour.
A coach can help you with clarifying your goal and steps around it by taking the guilt away because they are acting as an objective observer who can ask the right questions to help you implement an actionable plan you can easily follow to move forward towards your goal. This way, there's no shame or guilt; there's just action because you know you're doing something about it.
This is about taking control of your circumstances, so they don't take control over you and overwhelm you leaving you stuck. Overtime, showing up, taking action, and doing one step you can do can lead to great results.
I want you to consider that thing that you've been meaning to do that you haven't taken action on, write it down as a specific goal, and write the action step you will do on a certain day and do that step!
Goal: I want to achieve this...by..
Action Step(s): I will work towards that thing I can do by...
A specific goal + definable, doable action steps = results in moving forward
Take your power back by taking action! The next right step done continually leads to great progress, and then you'll look back at all that you accomplished! And remember, your value doesn't come from what you do; your value comes from who you are as a daughter of the King of kings, the Lord of lords and He has a lot of cool stuff for you to do as He created you! So, take action, get started start where you are, do what you can, and don't let guilt creep in and your feelings lie to you. Break it down simply to the next right step you can do, and then, rinse and repeat!
