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Have you ever said "I can't" or "I'll never" fill in the blank? These words can really stand in the way on a subconscious belief level. If you are really honest with yourself and take the time to look at these statements, there is likely an emotional thing that surfaces. I want to help you with the mindset that those statements are not totally true.

Fill in the blank: I can't do ________, I'm not able to do _________, or I will never get past __________.

For example, if you want to plant a garden, you can tell yourself, "I can't do that" or you can tell yourself, "I don't have the experience to be able to plant every single vegetable I'd ideally like to nor the time to tend to it, but I can get a container and look up on information on the internet ensuring I buy the right soil and put a few seeds in a container to get started." Gardening might not be something you can do all at one time right now, but you can do something. This is a mindset difference of saying you can't at all versus saying you can do something.

Sometimes we apply the thought that we can't do something to everything or much more and that's a catastrophic way of thinking. These thoughts creep in on a subconscious level and normally have an emotional impact. To think it's all or nothing can lead to a part of us never to be seen, touched or heard from again. We close a part of ourselves off and live in an area where we feel safe, and this leads to closing off BIG sections of our life. We generalize that feeling and think we can't do anything which is not true.

Somewhere between elementary and high school, I told myself that I couldn't talk. I told myself I couldn't be heard, so I needed to be quiet and not talk. The funny thing is that God made me a natural talker. When I look back at my history as a young child, I would talk to anybody, I loved everybody, and everybody was my friend. Everybody seemed to like me and gave good feedback, but at some point, I started to hear a different message. This new message told me to keep my opinions to myself, to be quiet, and not to make waves.

If I had to public speak during that time, I'd shake terribly, enough where people could physically see it, and my voice would just tremble. Jerry Seinfeld once spoke of the fear of death and the fear of public speaking and said that you are better off being the person in the coffin than having to speak at the funeral, and I think that's how I saw it. 

Somewhere back then, that trauma had silenced me and as God healed the trauma in me, I began to get my voice back. It happened at a church women's retreat where I was asked to speak and I immediately thought I can't do that, but the Holy Spirit gently moved me, not with condemnation nor with guilt, but said to me, "are you going to be selfish or are you going to serve me?" I was shocked by the thought of being selfish, and my immediate response was that I want to serve Holy Spirit, so I said yes despite being extremely nervous. As I went up to the front, I opened my mouth and let the Holy Spirit say what he wanted to say through me. I had a general outline, but I don't even know what came out of it. I just opened my mouth and did what God called me to do. From that moment, it was as if God released me from the fear and the lie that I can't do that! 

If I didn't get my voice back, I couldn't do podcasts, speak on television programs and to various church groups, or write blogs all for which God has called me to do. I know it's by God's grace that I show up with a servant's heart and ask Him to guide and use me making it about Him and not me, so that I can offer something to others. He gave me the gift of gab, the education, and the freedom to realize that I do have something to say, and He wants me to say it! God gave me back my voice which the enemy tried to steal...the enemy wanted me to be traumatized and hurting, so that I would shut up and people wouldn't be helped and wouldn't hear the message God ordained me to say. 

There are listeners and readers who respond about how much it has helped them. Some of them have been touched by what God wants them to do, and they no longer say they can't. If I had said that I wouldn't put myself out there, it would have been selfish and I wouldn't have been there for others and present to do what God has asked of me.

Because I am somebody who is somewhat of an introvert and very content to stay at home, and is just happy with the simple things, I really don't need to prove anything or go after anything for myself; however, God has created me (and each of you). He says I have a purpose for which He has created me and because He is the Lord of my life, I step into that faith one step at a time and go His direction leaving that selfishness behind.

I find that I am my best self who really feels alive and most like myself when I fully let God take control, and I step into what He's called me to do. I don't have to do it perfectly as He's perfect. It's not about doing things perfectly; it's about not listening to the enemy's lies. 

The question for you is: What is it that you think you can't do that God says you can? What is that passion or what you're created to be where you're in your most natural element and feel the most alive in Him...that freedom in Christ? Mine is to encourage people to do the things they think they can't do like heal from past pain, take steps towards their goals, go out and make a difference, and be the awesome magnificent masterpiece God created them to be. That's my passion and that's His heart for you: to be healed, to be whole, to be bold, to be empowered, and to take back the land the enemy has stolen and be a witness to the ends of the Earth. The enemy tends to tell you can't in the very area for who you were created to be, but you have all the power you need because God is perfect and He will walk with you!

If there is something that you want to do but you're getting in your own way, give it to the Lord and see what you can do. Plant that first seed to start a that garden later on or in this case, plant the seed of faith and let God grow it for you. Whatever you need, so that you take your next steps whether it's personal coaching with me, getting a church mentor, going to counseling, finding a support group of likeminded people, reading, journaling, mindset work in prayer and worship, or all of the above, take that step. It doesn't have to be speaking on a stage, but maybe it's just inviting a friend for coffee...one step you can do and let God take care of the big picture. Be obedient with the one thing and then the next thing and He will build it as He already knows the plan He has for you which is for good and not evil. As said in Jeremiah 29:11, He will give you a future and a hope and that will not be cut off.

I want you to be encouraged and I want you to challenge the lies of what you think you cannot do, and let God say what you can do!

Lead Behavior: Taking prescribed medication daily

Lag Indicator: Feeling better three months later

Lead Behavior: Getting 8 hours of sleep a night

Lag Indicator: Handling stress better and thinking more clearly overall within a month

Lead Behavior: Going to therapy weekly

Lag Indicator: Demonstrating more helpful problem-solving skills when relationship difficulties arise.

What you do consistently does not pay off with noticeable progress immediately, but the choice of action and the consistency of doing it is what you can control.

The effects that are produced from those lead actions are achieved after the fact.  They are measurable and may be beneficial or be found to need different lead actions to result in different outcomes, but the important thing you recognize is that the lag indicator outcomes follow the lead actions, often much later in time.

It is a common mistake to think that taking action doesn't matter because we may not see the resulting indicators quickly, yet, this is where mental health progress can stall.  This is the place where feelings are not facts. Just because you don't feel like it makes a difference to take your medication, get enough sleep, challenge your negative thoughts consistently, or whatever else, does not mean that it isn't worth it to do.

In fact, this is when it is important to step out in faith and be consistent, so that you begin the actions that result in the payoffs you are hoping to achieve.

What will you do today, and do consistently, whether you feel like it or not, that will get you to your goal over time? 

When you take care of the lead behaviors, the lag indicators of success and reaping the good that was sewn results over time.

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