Have you ever done something or lived in the same place for many years and then got uprooted from your sense of normalcy? If so, you know this can be a struggle. Here are 10 ways to move toward peace and healing. Whenever we have a big transition, even if it's positive, such as going on vacation to Disney World, there is still going to be stress. Even though going on a vacation "should" be a positive experience. Whether the transition is positive or negative, its a disruption to what's familiar.
1. Normalize the Reaction:
Let yourself know that your nervous system has been through a lot. Show yourself compassion, not shame. Give yourself grace, positive self-talk, and reassurance. Acknowledge this is hard. "Why don't we take a deep breath and take a nap?" Self-care is important.
2. Chunk Down the Things that are All Together
Break it down into manageable steps. Ask yourself: what is one small thing that you can do today that will help you feel even the slightest bit better and more grounded? It can be one new task a day or even each week. Chunk it down so that it's not overwhelming.
3. Make Short and Long Term Goals
Make two separate lists; one for short term and one for long term goals. For example, it could be goals for a week and goals for a month. Whatever works best for you. If you put things into categories you can get more of a handle on it sometimes and that can help you feel more in control and less anxious.
4. Use Grounding Tools Daily
Deep slow breathing to regulate your Nervous System. Sipping water, something comforting...whatever it is that has a slowing effect. Bring in your senses. What does it taste like? What does it feel like? What temperature is it? What speed am I going? Whatever you can tune into with your senses helps to ground you in the here and now. The present moment is where your power is. Even 5 minutes a day of this type of regulation can help your body come back into balance. So find something you can do and make it a habit.
5. Recreate Familiar Routines
Recreate something that you used to do and enjoy. Something that builds familiarity in your routine helps you to say "I am safe again." For example, having coffee while sitting on your porch.
6. Name and Express the Grief and Loss You're Having
Losses must be honored. Say it out loud or write in a journal what your feelings are. "I am sad." "I miss my hometown." "I miss my friends." Then find a way to process through the grief. Journaling, talking to someone, seeking out professional counsel, asking for prayer can all help.
7. Improve Communication with your Spouse
If they don't understand, you can feel unsupported and lonely. If you're talking emotions and your husband is talking logic, ask him if he can comfort the emotions first before he tries to give you logic. Or reverse it if needed. Find supportive people who are safe and can help your Nervous System regulate.
8. Build New Support, One Connection at a Time
Take one small step. Send one short text. Do one coffee invite. Slow, consistent action and connection builds trust and helps you to feel more in control of what feels uncontrollable.
9. Return to your Source of Strength
The Lord is near to the broken hearted. "I am broken hearted and He is near to me." "I can trust in the Lord with all my heart and He will direct my path." (Proverbs 3:5-6) You can own that this is where you're at and God is with you. In our weakness, God is strong.
10. Give Yourself Credit and Celebrate Each Win
Every time you take a small step, you're reclaiming safety. You're helping your Nervous System realize that it did survive. I made a new friend, I asked for help, I shared my feelings, I had positive self-talk. These moments matter, so celebrate them.
You are not alone and you're not too far gone. There is a path forward. Just take it one step at a time. Do the next thing that makes the biggest difference.
I hope this gave you a framework for understanding whenever you have transitions, whether positive or negative. Negative feelings don't necessarily mean that you're doing anything wrong.
If this episode resonated with you, please rate and review the show. Share it with friends who might need some encouragement. For more resources and to stay connected, visit our website or check out our Shine membership community for real connections and support on your journey.
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